IN RESPONSE TO GOV. RICK PERRY, LOCO JOE THROWS HAT IN RING

PRESIDENTIAL PLATFORM OUTLINED

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Candidate Loco & 1st Lady, Karen

AUSTIN, TEXAS. If you are up for a serious candidate and a refreshing spoof, then check out guest writer Loco Joe Heidelmeier's platform for the presidency below.  Loco decided to enter the race when he heard Gov. Perry was praying (as governor) for rain in Texas --  and it didn't rain. (New York Times rain story) I suppose, if it had rained, Joe would have voted for Perry.  Comments and campaign contributions welcome.
-- Russ Barnes, Moderator, "Travel with a Twist."

LOCO: THE PLATFORM

Downright scary. I've not seen a candidate in any party that I could vote for.  I just don't want Jesus with my eggs and grits when we are at war on 3 fronts, and appear to be going back into recession. I wish we had someone like a Bob Schieffer (CBS' "Face the Nation") or a Colin Powell. Michelle Bachman is preaching anti-government and she worked for the I.R.S., pays for medicare, and has a farm that gets Government subsidies. I would probably vote for Hillary if she wanted to run, but that's not going to happen.

Obama is in a tight spot. He promised too much, and all his senators and reps are taking it apart.  But we don't need another Palin, McCain circus.

LOCO FOR PRESIDENT

No religion, but respect all. Good brains. (what's left). No affairs. No quirky financial dealings (no money). No skeletons in the closet. Like guns, pets from the shelters, and Mexican food.

From Texas. Don't pay $100 for a a haircut. Don't get 'em. Like beer. (That's a lot of votes.) I can go hunting without shooting a colleague in the face. Don't know a thing about law. That's why you hire lawyers.

Never been in the service, but went to a lot of buddies' funerals that died in Viet Nam. My dad was a P.O.W. in WW2.

Wife, Karen, would be first lady. Teach people how to make their own clothes instead of going to Wal-Mart.

I'd appoint Russ Barnes and Wayne Langham to be on my cabinet. Of course we would have Sharon Barnes to document all our triumphs. The White House would have a Cabela's in it.

CHICKENS IN THE ROSE GARDEN -- BBQ CLOSE BY OVAL OFFICE

There would be a BBQ pit close by the Oval Office. Beside Michelle's vegetable garden, there would be a place for my chickens, and maybe a goat or two (cabrito). No Donkeys or Elephants.

My son John would be Secretary of Transportation and teach people how to save by riding a bicycle. Lance Armstrong would be his assistant.

Instead of Camp David, we would go to A.C. Ranches in Fort McKavett. Sit in the bar, plan strategy, then go shoot an Elk. Trips would be limited to the Northern Hemisphere. Save on jet fuel. All the other dignitaries (from other countries) would have to come here. Instead of the Secret Service driving black Suburbans, they would have jacked up F-350 4-wheel-drive trucks. Their clothing would all be from the Cabela's in the White House.

Every new foreign dignitary would have to take a course on John Wayne and Elvis.

Willie Nelson and Dolly Parton would be in charge of entertainment.

I'll be on CNN in the morning. Just got paid; so that's my campaign fund  for now.

-- President Loco JOE
 
PLEASE NOTE:  Joe Heidelmeier runs for President of the United States using the nom de plume, “Loco Joe.”  His party affiliation is “Party for America.”  Anyone can write in the name, Loco Joe.  To get his votes counted, a petition is required signed by about 35 people. An email affirming your desire for Joe to be on the ballot counts as a signature.  Send affirmative emails to jhknives@austin.rr.com with this language included: “I believe Joe Heidelmeier is the best candidate for President of the United States.  Therefore I sign this petition and affix my name in order to place Mr. Heidelmeier on the ballot for the general presidential election in the year 2012.”  By signing the petition, you do not obligate yourself to vote for him -- only to get him on the ballot as your option.

Please send the address of Loco Joe’s announcement of his candidacy and platform to all your friends at http://travelwitwist.blogspot.com/2011/08/in-response-to-gov-rick-perry-loco-joe.html.  Link it to social media.

A NEW NATIONAL INFRASTRUCTURE BANK?

REGIONAL ECONOMICAL DEVELOPMENT-- THEN AND NOW
(c) by Russ Barnes

I'm a Main Street type of guy.

So I have a story about debt and spending which many will understand. What a boring subject -- debt and spending, yes? Maybe we can liven up the story a bit!

DEBT, SPENDING, AND THE THIRD LEG OF THE STOOL

Today the debt ceiling of the United States was raised -- after much angst. Most of the commentary focused on two factors: expenditures (what cash goes out from the government) and taxes  (what cash comes into the government).

What has been little discussed is a third leg of the stool: regional economic development -- the enlargement of the whole economic pie all around. With a larger pie, expenditures and taxes both decline in importance.

Cluss Lumber Company truck

BUILD, REPAIR, AND CREATE JOBS

I know this from personal experience -- from my family. And I'm telling this story because I would like to dramatize the importance of infrastructure building in the equation which has been mostly avoided in the current discussion --  by politicians and Wall Street speculators alike. And I would like, later in the discussion, to bring in a Texas perspective.

So to the story. Infrastructure. Building things. Repairing things.

The story is set in the 1950’s and 1960’s in Uniontown, Pennsylvania. I was part of an extended family most of whom lived in houses built close to 19 Eggleston Street. My grandfather owned a family business, O.C. Cluss Lumber Company, which sold  construction materials for building houses, roads, bridges, and other structures. His two sons, Charles and John, worked there, and also my father, Barney.

About the three-legged stool: there were months when our family business could not meet payroll. I was in my late teens at the time. I cannot guarantee the complete accuracy of this report -- but here is what I remember.


LOCAL BANKER

At the time the company had about 50 employees. They needed to be paid. The lumber company was reliable as there were good months ahead to pay the debt.. So my dad, my grandfather, and my Uncle Charles would go downtown to the Fayette National Bank on Main Street to meet with the bank president, Jay Leff. This was not Citibank for sure. This was a local bank that was invested in the community.

One month, Mr. Leff declared, "I want to loan you more money than you are asking for simply to meet your payroll.  I would like you to expand your business. If you come up with a good plan, I will put my money into it.  It will do me good as your banker if you do more business; it will help the entire Uniontown community, and that will help both of us. What I ask is that you go in with me on this investment. Take some of your year-end bonuses and match them with what I am offering.  If you are not willing to expand your business, I can't help you to meet your payroll."

NO BAILOUT

This was not a bailout. This was spending for a purpose. What the banker was asking was that a distinction be made between monthly revenue requirements (such as paying employees and maintaining inventory) and making a capital investment. Two different kinds of money, two different kinds of expenditures. He was asking my family to expand the community pie.

Do we not, in fact, need this sort of action in the United States right now?

My dad, Barney (C.J. Barnes), went to work on the case. With the extra capital at his disposal, he spearheaded an effort to build a concrete factory as an extension of the construction company . Building U.S. infrastructure back in the 50's and 60's was politically correct. Both parties -- that of Eisenhower and that of JFK -- cooperated on such projects as the interstate highways and the repair of the old Pennsylvania Turnpike -- all of which benefited all our nation. I was sent by my grandfather to Washington as well as to Harrisburg, the capital of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, to make bids for the company's concrete product to contribute to building the country's infrastructure. It was a perfect alliance between the private and public sectors and created many jobs in our region and elsewhere. Such kinds of efforts were a winner, both locally and nationally.


TEXAS PERSPECTIVE

This Thursday I will publish another personal story to illustrate the importance of spending and capital investment. After that, my plan is to interview several sources in Texas on this subject. I like Texans' views on capital investment.   While they are conservative, they are also interested in local /regional development, which makes for a bigger economic pie.  I am especially interested to hear their viewpoints about the Infrastructure Bank which the President mentioned in his speech this afternoon -- hopefully modeled after such institutions as the local Fayette National Bank in Uniontown so many years ago.

Please check in again on Thursday and beyond for ways in which the past may herald the future which awaits us -- perhaps in Texas, perhaps across the nation.